A question frequently arises within Christian circles today: Is it possible for Christians to maintain genuine fellowship when faced with radical differences on moral and political issues? This is a good concern, as we are rightly called to be on the lookout for things that unduly disrupt Christian unity and fellowship. However, my answer to this question may surprise some, as it depends significantly on the nature of the differences involved.
There was a time, perhaps in the not-too-distant past, when political differences among Christians were of a different character. This era, which I refer to as the old political divide, involved disagreements primarily focused on the means of solving problems that both sides agreed existed. For example, Republicans and Democrats might have agreed that poverty was a problem but differed on the best way to address it – perhaps through a welfare state or by encouraging free market economies. Similarly, there might have been agreement on the need for national defense but disagreement on the best strategies to pursue it. Issues like how to educate children could be discussed in a fair-minded exchange based on shared values. These were the kinds of issues where there was “a lot of wiggle room” for Christians to hold differing views and discuss them. Crucially, these disagreements were not considered issues of orthodoxy or core essential moral or theological doctrines.
However, the landscape has fundamentally shifted. The new political divide has, in large sense, become the moral divide. We may wish it were not so, but this is the reality we face. Today, we see major political parties and movements advocating positions that strike at the heart of fundamental moral and, I would argue, biblical truths. For instance, there is a political movement that asserts that boys can be girls and is willing to promote surgeries that mutilate children in pursuit of a different gender identity. There is also a major political stance arguing that it is acceptable to intentionally kill innocent human beings in the womb, and seeking to silence those who disagree. Furthermore, we see a redefinition of marriage, moving away from the biblical understanding of a covenant relationship between one man and one woman to something that can be rearranged according to desire. As my colleague Greg Koukl points out, it’s become a contract where you could seemingly “marry your canary”.
On these significant moral issues, the debate is no longer about how best to pursue common objectives we agree upon; it is a divide between those rushing to deconstruct what many understand as moral and good, and those seeking some degree of restraint. This presents a profound challenge for Christians. If one is committed to the sanctity of life in the womb, committed to marriage as the best institution for family and societal flourishing, and committed to the biblical truth that God created humanity male and female, assigning gender at creation, can one legitimately fellowship with people who reject all of that?.
I am going to “go out on a limb” here, and this may “tick some of you off,” but my answer is no. While in the old political sense, fellowship was certainly possible, in today’s world, I find it difficult to comprehend how I could genuinely fellowship with someone who denies and actively seeks to undermine politically all that I perceive as good, true, and beautiful based on a biblical worldview.
Some will immediately raise the objection that this stance throws Christian unity “out the door”. I disagree. This is not about discarding unity; it is about taking a stand on non-negotiables. These issues are not mere preferences; they involve things that are necessary for our working order together and are not things Christians can simply overlook. It is not good for society, nor is it good for those who claim the name of Christ, to affirm and actively work to deconstruct fundamental truths. On a personal, even “feeling level,” I will admit that I feel much more “at home” having dinner with secular atheists who affirm my moral convictions than I do with progressive Christians who deny them. This distinction is crucial, because while I wouldn’t claim to have fellowship with a secular atheist, I also question whether I can truly have fellowship with progressive Christians who hold such fundamentally different views.
This leads to an essential clarification: we must distinguish between Christian fellowship and friendship. I want to be clear: I am not saying you cannot be friends with people who differ from you fundamentally on political and moral issues. I do have friends who identify as progressive Christians, and I engage with them. We can “break bread” together, have dinner, hang out by a fire pit, and enjoy conversing. I am “okay with that”. I will share a meal, laugh at their jokes, and even pay for the meal. I haven’t “cut them off”. It is vital when dealing with family members or friends who hold these views to keep the relationship channel open, without sacrificing your core convictions.
However, when it comes to Christian fellowship, where we are meant to come together as like-minded sinners to plead for God’s mercy, call upon the blood of Jesus for salvation, worship God in His greatness, and affirm His moral laws, the dynamic changes. True Christian fellowship is built around shared principles, shared values, and a shared theology. I don’t know how this is possible in today’s world when people deny essential moral truths.
Furthermore, I have observed anecdotally – without presenting an empirical study – that 100% of my progressive friends not only hold views supporting abortion, same-sex marriage, and transgenderism, but they also deny fundamental Christian doctrines. These include crucial truths such as the substitutionary penal atonement of Christ on the cross and the belief that Christ is the only way to salvation. They often hold to religious pluralism. These beliefs do not fit comfortably, in fact, they do not fit at all, within the framework of a biblical worldview.
If you find yourself in a church that denies essential Christian truths – denying the truth of the pro-life position, denying that marriage is between a man and a woman, denying that genders are assigned by God at creation and are not for us to remake – I must say this as lovingly as possible: I don’t think you are going to be able to change that church. As Churchill noted about trying to warn England in the 1920s and 30s, it’s nearly impossible to carry out a grand scheme from a subordinate position. When you are not in the leadership structure, changing the institution’s direction is incredibly difficult. Therefore, if you are in a church that denies these moral truths, which some might dismiss as merely political, you need to get out. You are not in a church that is biblically grounded. You need to find one that affirms these moral truths.
Some will push back, saying this is being judgmental or unduly critical. But where in the Bible does it say we are not to judge?. While Jesus did say “judge not, lest you be judged,” we must read the rest of the chapter and other New Testament passages. Jesus makes it clear elsewhere that we are to judge, but we are to do so righteously. One way we judge righteously is by asking whether a particular belief, political position, or theological stance lines up with scripture. We should discriminate based on this question; we should not make room for error. It is not a blessing of unity to “wink” while fundamental Christian truths are trampled underfoot. Jesus himself drew distinctions between sheep and wolves and used strong language towards the Pharisees, calling them “snakes” and saying, “Your father is the devil”. This suggests that judging goes beyond petty conclusions about right and wrong; it involves calling out evil and clarifying it for what it is. Standing on what a man and a woman truly are, insisting that unborn children are human beings, or stating that marriage must be between a man and a woman is not being judgmental or intolerant; it is standing on truth and the necessary structure God has put in place for human flourishing. Affirming transgenderism can even be seen as affirming a mental distortion, and we need to help people, not affirm their “insanity”.
Staying in a church that promotes or overlooks evil means you are supporting it with your tithing and resources. No relationship is worth denying fundamental biblical truth. The Bible is clear that all humans have value because they bear the image of God, and thus, the shedding of innocent blood is strictly forbidden. The science of embryology confirms that the unborn are distinct, living, and whole human beings, meaning the commands against shedding innocent blood apply to them just like everyone else. Do not allow people to dismiss these distinctions as merely political. Abortion is not merely a political issue; it is a moral issue that entails political responsibility. Imagine a pastor in 1860 telling Christians not to let their differences over slavery divide their fellowship, viewing it as a “petty political issue”. You would likely ask if “each other” in that fellowship included the slave. That argument fails when we explicitly consider the intentional killing of an innocent human being.
If your pastor refuses to grapple with the issue of what the unborn are, whether they are members of the human family, or presents only phony appeals to not judging or not getting political, without refuting pro-life arguments, he is intellectually lazy; he is a wolf. Get out. Find a church that is biblically grounded. If you cannot find one, seek help. Having biblically grounded fellowship is vitally important.
What about engaging with close friends or family members who seem to be drifting toward these views?. It is crucial not to fall into a fake sense of humility that prevents you from correcting someone. When a progressive pastor told me I was wrong for always wanting to correct people, he was, of course, correcting me. This illustrates that everyone operates from a worldview they are either explicitly arguing for or implicitly assuming. You are not being uncharitable, mean, or judgmental by challenging their worldview or making a case for your own. This is not what scripture means by not judging; it means we must judge righteously, making assessments about what is true and reasonable.
As Christians, do not fall for the “phony niceness” that says we shouldn’t disrupt fellowship by challenging wrong views. If you believed your friend was about to swallow arsenic thinking it was aspirin, you would aggressively intervene. When people deny essential Christian doctrines like the deity of Christ, salvation through Jesus alone, or His substitutionary death – issues of eternal salvation – you must intervene. I would argue that on the moral issues we’ve discussed, you must intervene as well. This is not about being a partisan political hack; it is motivated by love for your neighbor. You love your unborn neighbor and do not want to see them systematically butchered. You love women pressured into abortions. You assert the truth of marriage and gender because you love your neighbor and understand what leads to human flourishing.
When someone is supporting a political party that wants to deconstruct and tear down the structures God has put in place for human flourishing, you have to ask what common ground you truly have with them. It must go deeper than simply liking them. While I have friends who claim to be Christian but deny fundamental doctrines and central Christian ethics, I am not treating them as Christians in the sense of fellowship. I treat them cordially as friends, I hang out with them, but genuine Christian fellowship is different.
If these friends ask if you are saying they are not Christian, I suggest you don’t answer directly. Instead, say: “Let me tell you what I am saying. We differ significantly on these issues. They are vitally important, and we better get to the bottom of who’s right because if I’m wrong, I want to change my mind and line up with truth. And if you’re wrong, eternity could be at stake.”. These are weighty matters that we must be willing to grapple with.
It is disheartening when spiritual leaders avoid these issues, citing a lack of consensus in their church. Pastor, your job is not to respect a consensus that contradicts biblical truth; your job is to forge a consensus around biblical truth. You are there to convey eternal truths vital to the Christian life, not to respect people’s feelings. If you are unwilling to courageously forge consensus on vital issues from the pulpit, you should “get out and do something else”. Yes, preaching biblical truth on these matters may cause some people to leave the church, but perhaps they were never truly part of the invisible church if they leave when faced with truth. You should not be afraid to warn them. Do not cut the relationship off, but I would not pretend to have fellowship. Do not pretend these are secondary issues.
As a pro-life Christian, it is vital that you stand firm on what you believe and convey that truth, even when facing criticism. To help with this, there are resources like the Prolife 101 course. This course aims to equip you in just seven days to stand firm on your pro-life principles. You will learn that the abortion issue is not complex; it boils down to what is the unborn?. You will learn to defend the unborn using the science of embryology and philosophical arguments for their value. You will also learn to recognize and handle the five bad ways people argue about abortion, where they often try to change the subject instead of refuting your argument. For example, if you argue abortion is wrong because it kills an innocent human being, and the critic asks, “Why do you hate women?”, they are changing the subject to your alleged motive instead of addressing the argument. The course helps you develop a “very sharp phony baloney alert mechanism” to detect these tactics. The goal is to equip you to stand for truth and make a difference. While people may not change their minds immediately, you can follow Greg Koukl’s advice and put a “pebble in their shoe” that will wear on them until they deal with it. Your job is to give them something substantial to think about.
Ultimately, these differences matter. Do not let false teachings or the desire for a false unity cause you to stray from the gospel or fundamental biblical truth. The differences are not secondary; they are foundational, impacting not only our ethics but often our core theology. While we can extend friendship and cordiality, true Christian fellowship demands shared foundational truths.